THE GREATEST REGRET OF COLLEGE LIFE
A General`s story
Two weeks ago, we – the finalists in the Christian Union met for a socializing session. While in groups of six in a roundtable, everybody was asked to say something about themselves. So we did. Ordinarily it goes like, “My name is Joemark Mureithi, am a fifth year student, 5.2 (fifth year second semester), pursuing BSc. Mechanical Engineering, I have served in the Union as the Manifest Head, Vice Chair and in Nurturing Ministry. I come from… and I am saved.”
The coordinator had apportioned about 45 minutes for that session. Now, if typing that statement takes less than a minute, undeniably saying takes fewer. So it did not last more than 10 minutes to make the round. People began asking random questions. The first one went like, “What do you regret most about your campus life?” Normally, I do not process things too well on my feet, I love thinking through. However, there was not much luxury of time. Providentially, I was third from the questioner anyway it went, so I would not have been better favored. In no time, my turn came. Giving it a final thought, from the top of my head, I said ashamedly, “I regret all times, any single one, which I have lived in deliberately disobedience to the law of God.”
Today- as I write this, a fortnight later, I have thought more lucidly about this question and most sanely I accord the same answer. Simply put, given a chance to be a freshman again, there are many things I would love to do better. These include what was sinful, debatable or otherwise. But if I was given a clean slate, and a magic thread, that would turn the hands of the clock back and told to redo it all over again, what I would do differently is to treasure God`s law more.
In the prophets, God says this about Himself Isaiah 46:9b-10:
‘For I am God, and there is no other; I am God, and there is none like me, declaring the end from the beginning and from ancient times things not yet done, saying, ‘My counsel shall stand, and I will accomplish all my purpose,’. 
God is sovereign. From end to end, through all aspects of life. God has never learnt anything. That comprises our lives; sinful or righteous. We take the next breath only because God sanctions and man is saved only because God grants salvation. Elaborately, none comes to God apart God draws him. In other words, our salvation is wholly of God, and God will effectually save whomever He wills. Even so, man is fully responsible for his moral choices.
That is; our RUIN, if we are lost, will be wholly of ourselves. We shall reap the fruit of our own choice. We shall find that we have lost our own souls. Linked between these two principles lies truth which we must maintain firmly, and never let go. There is doubtless deep mystery about it. Our minds are too feeble to understand it now. But we shall understand it all hereafter. God’s sovereignty and man’s responsibility shall appear perfectly harmonious one day. In the meantime, whatever we doubt, let us never doubt Christ’s infinite willingness to save. 
This seamlessly leads to the fact that we are saved by grace alone. That we are not saved because of good works, rather, because we are saved we do good works. I am a Christian on the merits of Christ alone. The holy life I could never live He lived, and He died the substitutionary death on the cross, that I deserved. His blood atones for all my sins; past, present and future sins. This hope and answer alone will I carry to the gates of the celestial city- nothing of me. None whatsoever. This I trust with all my heart, and the Holy Spirit is in me a deposit, to that effect.
I do not believe in superstition, so take the magic thread mention up there with light criticism. This includes the mystic superstition of superhuman talks of a Christendom people that talk using some direct unseen especial means with God, and relay to the rest, what deity says or showed them apart from Holy Writ. Just to say I believe in the sufficiency of scripture.
Enough of the fibers that mete me. Why then is my disappointment in deliberate disobedience?
Well this is why.
The Travesty of sin
First, the travesty of sin. The sole reason is this, the treachery and sinfulness of sin. Well, in my youth years, I have flirted with sins. All thinkable youthful sins. Name them, a lot and worse secretive. Sadder still as a professor of Christ. Allow me not to mention specifics because of the nature of deceitfulness of sins (I have been there and at times it goes like if this guy harbors such, why should I not?). I would be willing to share more in person. The major umbrellas are: sinful sexual lusts and addictions, pride and self-centeredness. I should not have attempted to begin this list because it’s endless, yet so cross linked and rooted at Adamic nature. These have nonetheless showed what my heart is like.
“Well, why the fuss then if you are a believer, or a professor at least?” You ask. This is why. All times I have been wallowing in my own vomit of sin, in the deceit of I am struggling, there has never been greater gloom and misery in my life. I have only seen life then as through the visor of unbelief, doubt and fear of damnation. My conscience, has then been all signals up, all flags out and life so sorrowful and horrible. Or is it not true that before the judgment throne every one of us will stand?
The deceitfulness of sin, yet supposes that it is in the pattern of a struggling Christian to fell all times and rise once. The truth is, the nature of a struggling Christian is a victor over sins who wins many times and loses every so seldom. Believer, do not be consoled in your sin with the excuse of, `many people struggle`, or `I fall so let me stay here longer and rise once and for all`, how sure are you that you will ever rise if not now? Will sin not consume you to death? If kids behaved like that they would never walk. The nature of struggling is in prolonged victories. It is in rising to walk, and believing with all the heart and mind that we are victorious in Christ, and be trained unto righteousness thus, as the grace suffices.
****** (To be continued…) ******
 “Bibles,” in The Holy Bible, English Standard Version, Good News Publishers, pp. Kindle Locations 127923-127925.
 J.C. Ryle, “Expository Thoughts on the Gospels,” 1856-69, pp. location 14242-14248.